"Self pity is our worst enemy, and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in the world."
- Helen Keller1880-1968, Blind and Deaf Educator

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

A Needed Update


I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted. I'm surprised I have enough time to brush my teeth, frankly. I just wanted you all to know I am not completely gone, just trying to find my way in this amazing new journey for me.

The years of infertility and losing Sally Ann has given me a heightened appreciation for my little sweetie. I am completely present and engaged in the good, bad and ugly. No one can prepare you for the overwhelment of the first couple of months. I'm already sad of the growth I've been witness to. In a future post I want to write about how life is a series of weanings. This little being was once a speck within me- part of me. Then she became a separate being. As she gets bigger and older, she will pull away. Right now, I'll just enjoy all I can give to my daughter and try to be in the moment. It's hard to do but I need to do it or I will drive myself crazy.

Was the journey worth it? Taking a look at the pictures, you know the answer. While it doesn't take away the hurt from my loss, it does distract me.



8 comments:

areyoukiddingme said...

What a beautiful distraction!

Kami said...

While it doesn't take away the hurt from my loss, it does distract me.

Exactly what I would say. It is a wonderful distraction and does goes so fast. I know it and knew it and I still feel like I am not present enough with the young ones.

Congrats again and thanks for the update!

Dreams and False Alarms said...

It's amazing how babies go from scrawny newborns to chubby little infants! She's georgeous!

Bee Cee said...

She is absolutely beautiful. Right with you on the series of changes till they finally pull away. But there are some delightful moments every day aren't there? My heart feels full and complete now, I hope yours is healing and happy x

kkwg said...

Yes, I agree--a wonderful distraction! Enjoy! Thanks for following my story. Can you tell me what "resolve" is? You mentioned it on my page. I live in California. Where are you?

kkwg said...

Would love to know more about your research. Don't know how to email you, though...

Thanks so much for following me! While I don't wish this on anyone, it is somehow comforting to know I'm not alone.

kostantina said...

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mrsmuelly said...

Very well said. A new baby doesn't "fix" it, but she is an amazing distraction. Congratulations! She is gorgeous.