"Self pity is our worst enemy, and if we yield to it, we can never do anything wise in the world."
- Helen Keller1880-1968, Blind and Deaf Educator

Monday, August 11, 2008

Early in the Pregnancy

Thinking back to the pregnancy, the next week or so after the good news included repeated trips to the hospital to retake the pregnancy test and to make sure I was really pregnant. Each time was filled with trepidation followed with such hope, then happiness, then relief.

Was this really MY time? My baby?

I was so happy and terrified at the same time.

I am so in despair at what happened. I wanted Sally Ann so badly and now she's gone. Not even a chance to take her first breath. It feels so unfair. How do I find hope again to go on? How do I find relief? I can't make sense of this nighmare. I wish I could wake up and it all will be gone!

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